Most people want meaningful relationships. Few know how to build them.
Here are 7 frameworks that helped me move past small talk—and build real connection:
1/ The 15% Rule
Growth happens just outside your comfort zone.
→ Share just 15% more than usual. Not enough to feel unsafe—but enough to invite real connection.
2/ The Ladder of Inference
We react to stories, not facts.
→ When you feel triggered, rewind. Start from what actually happened—before interpreting intent.
3/ Net Worth vs. Net Contribution
Strong relationships aren’t about keeping score.
→ Ask: Am I adding value, or just expecting it?
4/ The Exchange Structure
Openness invites openness.
→ Match their vulnerability. Don’t overshare, but meet them where they are.
5/ The Three Levels of Connection
Small talk keeps us stuck.
→ Move from facts → opinions → feelings. That’s where trust lives.
6/ The Power of Feedback
You can’t grow what you can’t see.
→ Ask: “What’s one thing I could do to make our relationship stronger?”
7/ The Trust Triangle
Trust = Sincerity + Reliability + Competence
→ Be real. Follow through. Show you’re capable. That’s the foundation.
These insights come from the book Connect by David Bradford & Carole Robin—shared via Omar’s Desk.
What’s something you wish you’d learned earlier about connection?👇
PS: We’re wired for connection. It’s not just a want—it’s a need.